A: Just in case he had to save the day. Why would firefighters be great action movie stars? 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A. Hosea and Hoseb The two start to hit it off. "From now on when I say BELL 1, I want you to strip naked. Business Insider. ", "My friend wants to be a fireman one day because he has a lot of burning passion for the job!". A: It was known for the racket it made. To my first 9am shift. Jared Goldstein The Hilarious Young Comic Making Waves with His Witty Humor, James Heaney Learn about This Multi-Talented Improv Artist, The Funniest Hispanic Comedians You Must Know About. Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. What starts most household fires? When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. Anyone want to know how many firemen and firefighters' jokes are there?There are zero jokes about firefighters because they are all facts! What does CHAOS stand for? He won't expect it back. Related Topics. How to fight a fire. Whether it's the swift one-liners of Tim Vine or Milton Jones, or a more traditionally structured joke, these quick-fire quips will have your friends rolling around on the floor. He was never allowed to become a firefighter. Hey, hot stuff! Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. Ask her anything! Theyre the only person there who actually understands the fire. When theyve caught fire themselves. "Thanks," the girl replied. So, any way you look at this, these firefighting jokes are genuinely cool and definitely worth your time. How can one tell that there is a firefighter at a party? Maybe that's why he got fired from the fire service. A: It was already toast when they got there. What should one do when a firefighter offers a person two ways to leave a house? They will tell you. Its always good to find out youre going to be working from home. I would not breed from this Officer. What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze? What do lawn ornaments do over winter break? Q: What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze? When the teach asked Johnny what his dad does Johnny said "Well my dad is a stripper in a gay bar, and if the guy looks good and the money is right he'll have sex with him out back in the alley." We hope you enjoy our collection of the best firefighter jokes! Anyone can write on Bored Panda. You will actually need 5 to change a light bulb.One to change it while the others will cut a hole in the roof and hold the ladder! How do you put out a fire? As the fire truck flies down the street, she sees her son attached to the top, yelling: Weyoweyoweyo ! As firefighters are supposed to be very quick, how do they sleep?They are always fast asleep! Q: Why was it taking so long for the fire fighters to get to the strawberry farm? Little Johnny's hand shot up and the firefighter called on him. "I hate those people who knock on your door and tell how you need to be "saved" or you'll "burn" Stupid firefighters". He was a John Dough. WTF? Why did the fireman wear suspenders?To keep his pants up. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation dog. Before long it exploded into flames and an alarm went out to fire departments from miles around. It's autumn, not long before the clocks change, and Halloween is around the corner. Why do firefighters use lights and sirens on the tops of the firetruck? There is nothing more satisfying than sharing your creations with your close . "One more time, I'm going to ask everyone to charge their glasses and - for those who still can - stand, raise a glass to the newlyweds."-Anonymous One liner tags . What did the fireman say to the chairman of the small-town football club, who had asked him to save the cups, when the fire started in the stadium? A: He heard there was a strike team. Q: What bugs fire fighters during the summer months? A: Just in case the sauce on taco Tuesday was too fiery. What award do you give a firefighter? Three to cut a hole in the roof and one to change out the bulb. Why did the fireman bring a ladder to the restaurant?He heard that drink refills were on the house. His name is Nathan Abe (initials NA) and he is firefighter, a second later a arsonist girl named Clair Laurence (initials CL)walks into the bar. As normal, don't expect any originality or hilarity Pilgrims. Wanna slide down my pole. Why was the fireman late for work during the power failure emergency? now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); What kind of ears will a fire pumper truck have? "Fantastic ! What would happen if Franciscan priests became firefighters?Then, they would be fighting fires with the help of friars! What did he name them? Their skin. What is the name of the machine that firemen used to detect any fire?The fire distinguisher! Q: What do firefighters surf with? Why dont most firefighters like to put candles on their birthday cake like everyone else? Q: What do fire fighters like with their cheese? Army soldiers are perfectly equipped to be a firefighter.This is because they are used to taking fire! 1. 1. Yeah, but he didnt quit. The firefighter was shocked when he got to know that one of his two sons had set fire to the building. Q. A guy calls the fire department and says, Ive just had my front yard landscaped, I have a nice new flower bed, a new fish pond with a fountain and a new rose garden.Very nice, the firefighter replies, but what does that have to do with the fire service?Well, the man answers, the house next door is on fire and I dont want you to trample my front yard., What did the fireman say to the clumsy baker? Noah good joke about fire fighting? Fire. A man was trapped in a burning building and a firefighter yelled through the window, "You have two possible exit points, this ladder or the stairs." Whats the most important thing you could hope to remember if youre a firefighter? Why doesn't the deputy firefighter look out of the window in the early morning? Funny One-Liners 1. "If you dare to come close, I'll knock you out!". The firefighter was shocked when he got to know that one of his two sons had set fire to the building.He declared, "This boy is not arson anymore!". Two wrongs don't make a right, take your parents as an example. We respect your privacy. Knock knock. They use him to keep crowds back, said one youngster. Firefighter Jokes Firefighter Lovemaking Rules A firefighter came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: Bell 1 rings and we all put on our jackets, Bell 2 rings and we all slide down the pole, Bell 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go. What happened to the firefighter the 3rd time he was late to work? A police officer pulled me over and said, "Papers." Insults one liners. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! A week later the building catches ablaze.He suffers from premature evacuation. The Irishman responds "I don't know it was burning when I walked in". What is the one thing that firefighters save during a fire?They always save the foundation! They start a fire under your bath. Q: Which superhero was the fire department always trying to recruit? Jan 21 . Golf is a lot like taxesyou go for the green and come out in the hole! Thanks! Hey Pandas, Who Was Your Favorite Black History Month Icon You Learned About This BHM? Their will to succeed. "You'll just have to learn to be a little patient." If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Which superhero was the fire department always trying to recruit? You can change your preferences. Q: Whats on every fire department menu? - David Lee Roth. ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), AITA? Q: Why did the rookie fireman bring a credit card to his first day? If you ask any firefighter what kind of cracker he preferred to eat, he would always reply that it is a firecracker! The Chiefs Have Arrived On Scene. Q. How do you get down from an aerial ladder?You dont get down from an aerial ladder. NindyaDerisa1318. We hope you will find these firework. These firefighter related pick up lines may just be what you are looking for. lets start with some short and punchy jokes. A: Engineers. His mother didn't want to crush his dreams but she knew he would never be accepted. Then I realized he was just an arsonist.". 82.43 % / 3814 votes. I correct them by saying it is actually warm! - Erma Bombeck. If you need some more material or just need to brighten up your day, here are 25 of the best engineering jokes from across the web. 45+ Creative Orange Puns That Will Brighten Your Day, 80 Creative Dinosaur Puns That Will Make You Roar. ~~~ And on the eighth day GOD made firefighters.. Bustin' ourssavin' yours. Q: When are firefighters best at getting out of the fire station quickly in the middle of the night? Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? Why did the fireman resign from the department? "I grew up thinking my dad was a fireman. Paramedics and EMTs can be staring down a life-or-death situation in the blink of an eye. (Closed), I Create Functional And Decorative Art On Functional Items That People Can Use Every Day, And Here Are My Newest 23 Works, Hey Pandas, What Are Your Most Useful Travel Tips? What kind of ears will a fire pumper truck have?They will have safety engin-ears! Whos there? Why do firefighters have a higher rate of cholesterol than other professionals? They are also known as firefighters, fire-chiefs, relievers, fire wardens, fire-fighters, stokers, cinder monkeys, smoke-jumpers, engineer's helpers, attendants and firemen. The firefighter was in the house when the alarm went for an explosion. Funny Fire Jokes A police officer says to a couple, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but your son set the school on fire". ", "Ever walk into a room and completely forget why you were in there? He had to be there.". What comes after a dragon lights his birthday candles? I am like a firefighter I find them hot and leave them wet "They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. 25. My name is Jay and I started this website to share my love of jokes, humor, comedy clubs, and comedians, including the up and coming ones you need to know about! 1. How do you know if a firefighter is at your party? Scroll down through these brilliants puns which can also be used as firefighter captions and firefighter one-liners. He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!". See more ideas about firefighter humor, firefighter quotes, firefighter. The Fire Chief searched for what causes fires on Google He got about 80,000 matches. They're good, thanks for asking! When are firefighters best at getting out of the fire station quickly? Do firefighters have to train to jump higher than a fire hydrant? Q: Why did the fireman wear suspenders? Anyone want to know how many firemen and firefighters' jokes are there? If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Why was the man who worked in a hydrant plant always late at his work?Because one cannot park near the place! Why did the rookie fireman bring a credit card to his first day? Why couldn't police notify the family of the murdered baker? A: The AFD. Cheeky Firefighter Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity Cats and ladders We had a burning desire to bring them to you because we knew how your face would light up! Why do you call a firefighter when theres a cat stuck in a tree? Yeah, thats why Im no longer a fireman.". Fire away! A: Because it was drawn to alight. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. The only food that firemen like to get on a busy day is a hot dog! Rest assured that this matter is discussed in these jokes about firefighters! When the firefighter saw the church razing down, he said "Holy smoke!". After thanking each of the old men individually, the president asked the group what they intended to do with the reward money. The Fire Department of the City of New York (FDNY) is the largest Fire Department in the US. 2 Do not argue with an idiot. 1. 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What holiday do firefighters refuse to celebrate? How would you rate the quality of the article? 84.36 % / 807 votes. So he installed a brass pole from my bedroom to the living room. The teacher asked everyone to take their seats and sit quietly, then asked Johnny to step into the hall. The boat and the firefighter have hard outer coverings (cascos). What did the restaurant owner say when a firefighter, a rabbi, and a policeman walked into his restaurant? What's in the water that puts out fires?A fire boat. A fire broke out at a cold-medicine factory on the outskirts of town thankfully, there was no congestion on the way. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. ", What comes after a dragon lights his birthday candles?The fire department. Why do firefighters in Greece make every fire worse? What should you call a fireman who is very motivated and pumped up?You should call him a fired up man! John D. MacDonald, "The early bird who catches the worm works for someone who comes in late and owns the worm farm." Why was the firefighter wearing blue suspenders?Because the red ones were still in the wash! How do most firefighters do their hair? Why do many fire departments keep dalmatians?Because they assist them in looking for hydrants! Do firefighters have to train to jump higher than a fire hydrant?No, because fire hydrants cant jump. In case you find any flaming cows. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. Engineers on a train. 180 School J okes Fireman Jokes More Fireman Jokes I tried being a fireman but I suffered burnout. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. Why do firefighters wear yellow overalls with stripes? First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you'll never miss the 'magical moment' and will always leave your audience amused (that is, if you've calculated your timing perfectly). A: There was a traffic JAM. By eating a lot of fried foods at work. But thats just a natural reaction to something we dont comprehend! A. Neilas often finds himself lost in making music, sim racing, watching movies, TV Series and playing video games in his free time. Flames. The girl was wearing a firemans helmet. Who do you call if you see a museum thats just caught fire? Why do firefighters wear boots with their uniform? - Billy Connolly. How did the firefighter propose to his colleague from the fire department?He said, "You set my heart on fire! Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. He's the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, but I was too embarrassed to say that.". Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. She said he was too spontaneous. What's the difference between an arsonist and a firefighter? Your feedback will help us improve the article. They must be saved! Why did the fireman send ten puns to his friends? Why did the man hug the fire exit and said everything was ok? Always borrow money from a pessimist. Fun Kids Jokes was created by parents as a safe place for other parents and their children to find something funny to giggle at. What sports team do firefighters root against?Portland Trail Blazers. Because it would be pretty hard to fight fires when theyre barefoot. It didn't work. Save the cups cries George. A: He whistled Hail to the Chief whenever he walked into a room. Firefighter are the guys or gals who couldnt pass the police exam. Did you hear about the firefighter whose wife left him? I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana - mafia. What did the father reply when the son asked him what the least favorite letter of a firefighter is? Why do volunteer firefighters understand the importance of milliseconds? How do firefighters make sure they can slide down the pole easier in the event of an emergency? Why is My 3 Year Old So Mean & When to Worry About It? 82.53 % / 355 votes. You're about as useless as an asshole with tastebuds. What should you say when a firefighter is smoking a cigarette? "My father always advised me to fight fire with fire. From firefighters putting out fires to firefighters rescuing kittens from trees, these jokes will have you laughing out loud. What should you call firefighters who start to grow flowers in their garden one day?You should just call them by their name! To everyones amazement the little fire engine raced through the Chemical plant gates and drove straight into the middle of the inferno. As a matter of fact, I started out the first three holes at 4 under par, including a eagle on the 3rd.. What would happen if the fire chief and newbie jumped out of the house on fire one day?The chief would land first because the newbie would stop and ask others for directions. Firefighters celebrate all holidays throughout the year except one.It is the occasion of May Day! Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station?He heard there was a strike team. So why are you so beat? his wife asked. The firefighter's wings fall off. Q: Why are so many firefighters optimistic? A: Aquaman. Q: Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station? Golfer: "I think I'll go drown myself in that lake.". 1. Because the rest of the firefighters were busy working. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); When there is a trailer fire, what is the first thing to get off from the fire truck?

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