Are you guys in a long-distance relationship? One guy told me that I deserved better, and I made the mistake of taking this as a compliment. A guy who wants to be with you will compromise and find a way to make the relationship work, but any form of resistance is him subconsciouslytelling you that he wants to break up. But out of nowhere your boyfriend hits you with this line You deserve better? It can drive anyone crazy. A compliment shifts the focus away from his depression and makes him feel good about himselftwo very necessary things. palmetto high school basketball tickets In the US a "psychologist" has a PhD. You can ask if hes okay and what you can do to help. I understand that the concept of unconditional love is new to you. Hes madly in love with you. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. That's why through experience, constant research, and development, I worked on understanding other people and myself better in romantic relationships. Its okay not to know what to do at times. He was always doing things for everyone else, always doing things for me. Depression is a recurrent illness which is likely to resurface later. I'd say that's definitely the depression talking. At 22 I hardly think you are a psychologist. 1. He thinks youre going to be disappointed in your life with him, 13. BetheButterfly, July 11, 2012 in Dating. She is very emotionally connected and just wants him to be well, and no longer be depressed. Telling him the particular thing you love each time you say something good about him makes it feel all the more genuine. Some days may be worse than others and his judgment might seem clouded and illogical. Unrequited love is defined as a love that is not reciprocated. Breaking up with your partner comes with a lot of sadness and sorrow. "I'm here for you." One of the sweetest things you can do for a depressed partner is to reassure them of your commitment. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Press J to jump to the feed. It would be someone to talk to to get this stuff off your chest without being called a baby and feeling like a annoyance to your boyfriend plus they will be able to help you gain some skills to deal with these feelings. What would you do in this situation? My guess is he has no drive. He says you can do better because I bet he honestly believes that. Dear Dragged Down, It sounds like you have been a tremendous source of love, strength, and support for your girlfriend in her battle with depression. They might also tell you it's not personal and they wished it could've worked out. Youll never be alone as long as Im alive., 28. Rita July 4th, 2018 at 12:48 AM . He feels that you deserve better than what he can give you, and hes not willing to be that better person. If youre in a long-distance relationship, this should help. These men get off on girls that beg for them. Others seem like theyre hiding something and just telling you this. Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Say statements like this to him when he does something helpful to show your appreciation. Its his way of telling you that he thinks youre great but he doesnt , He thinks youre stuck up. A person can start to feel better about themselves. 25. Then make posts of you having fun with captions that have nothing to do with him. Youll get through this., 63. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. All a man wants to accomplish in his life is sex. Are you wondering why on earth he would say something like that when you thought he was interested in creating a bright future with you? The thing is: thats not always the case. Youll usually hear this after youve established a relationship. She thinks her leaving him will only worsen his depression, yet she doesn't see herself as trapped in staying. Click the link to learn more about how this tool works and how it outs incriminating behavior from your romantic interests. Source: Depressed for 11+ years now. All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft, Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column. Being with a person who is depressed can easily net you the lack of positive affect you are experiencing. However, that doesnt always happen. He might not even treat you right. When someone tells you they are too messed up, they are warning you. Because a good and loyal man knows that feelings always diminish, but trust, respect, honor define love in action. 07/19/2016. (I made an r/relationships post about him constantly lying to me). 19 "I Don't Believe In Marriage". Do you want to know how to respond when a man says that you deserve better than him? Maybe he knows that hes going to be abusive or cheat. Hes also well aware that his life is going to bring yours down a level or two. Seeing your relationship challenges as an adventure requires a great deal of optimistic energy and Im guessing he could use that. A good car is nice, an ego boost or confidence boost from becoming successful is wonderful. We provide resources that help you in your relationship, marriage, and dating life. Im coming over soon, is there anything youd like me to get you?, 80. When your partner tells you that you deserve someone better, he means one of the following things -. Sharing can be difficult when you dont even get it yourself. For example, maybe his kids are heathens and theyre going to break all of your nice stuff. Sex with women and love from one beautiful woman for the rest of his life. Unfortunately this is one of the most frequent complaints we get from our readers, where they feel they aren't a priority for their boyfriend or husband. Anyway, read on for my ideas of sweet things you can say when your partner is feeling depressed. In most cases, this is the best thing you can do. Sounds like he needs to see someone. Relationship advice for women that is researched-backed and data driven and actually works. 1. As a psychologist, I'm really concerned that he's very depressed, but he absolutely won't accept my help and will not see another psychologist about it because he refuses to deal with his issues. I know because I used to make it all the time. Its a one-sided encounter that might leave us feeling hurt, angry, or ashamed. depressed boyfriend says i deserve better. Driven men are willing to become successful at any cost, and if youre not feeding his fuel to strive for more and become better, then his only option would be to move on from you. Youll also have the guy that is slowly becoming a criminal as a career and will wind up in prison for his entire life. You have a choice: live with him being depressed or leave and grieve the relationship. 3. Healthy, truthful communication involves discussing those issues. He was working two jobs and with the state of the economy now, the business is not making money. What People Say; Gallery; Menu; Contact; depressed boyfriend says i deserve better. I have met many guys who just got into their first relationship. It could really help someone with depression to know that somebody they love is thankful for them. The worst thing about getting close to someone is the thought that at any point, they could lose complete interest in you. He has to want to change. Do you think that in the case of a depressed human being, "you deserve better" means the above, or is it simply an issue of acute depression in this case? You say that you are missing your boyfriend - but you also say that you are worrying about him, so maybe what you really miss is the feeling of looking after him and being needed. How are we feeling about therapy today?, 40. At 22 years old I already had 22 years experience living with the mentally ill, the barely functional. He was diagnosed with depression and . depressed boyfriend says i deserve better . I know I do., 34. That's a pretty dangerous road to go down. It's possible for people to overcome depression without formal treatment but it's better to be safe than sorry: I'd talk with a psychologist about him, they're typically a better source of knowledge than a relationship advice site. When you begin to question his distance or why he ignores your calls, he will tell you that you are insecure. Welcome! I was always there for him - supported him when he was going through a rough time being unemployed, helped him to find a new job, spent hours and hours talking about his feelings, his issues. Copyright 2017 - 2022 by LoveDevani.com, 87 Sweet Things To Say To Your Boyfriend When Hes Depressed, 3. is there quicksand in hawaii. Being in a relationship with a partner that gets depressed a lot can be incredibly challenging, no one prepares for that. Acts of service mean more when its something he needs. OP, get this guy some help. This can alleviate the irritability issue mentioned earlier. Hes made up his mind to move on from the relationship. In order to know if your boyfriend wants to break up with you or not, we should consider some signs that tell us if he actually wants to break up. Though quit because he felt guilty and it wasn't the right thing to do. depression is a completely different story and quiet storm's "advise" should not be applied in the case of your friend. If you want a serious relationship with someone, pay attention when he says that you deserve better. It means, "Yeah, I know Im treating you crappy, but I wont put in more effort. Hes saying it, because hes treating you badly. This. I know it feels like it sometimes, but none of this is your fault., 53. He already feels it from everyone else, including himself. When he says "you deserve better" it really bothers her though, because she sees herself as a team with him. You need to be a woman that motivates a guy to take action, by either being better for you or leaving you, so hell stop wasting your time. You want more than anything to cheer them up, yet, most of the time, you cant help but feel powerless. For , He doesnt think the two of you have a future. But the way you can find out if this is the reason he is doing this is to check how quickly he moves on from the conversation and accepts your argument when you told him that I am enough for him. However, that doesnt mean that hes willing to put in the work to do that. All I want is to make you happy for as long as I can., 26. It's okay to feel frustrated or angry. This guide is packed with ideas for sweet things to say to your boyfriend when he is depressed. Thats why I want to recommend this story of how I learned to make men adore me. Youll get information about his calls, SMS, social media and other online communications. Hell feel bad a lot of the time because conversations will mostly revolve around him and his health. Feb 06, 2017. I love him and I want to make it work, I'm just posting here because I would like a guy's perspective. Listen to your partner when he shares without chiming in. Hes simply done with the relationship, 12. Sometimes, this is all you can do. Is your boyfriend feeling down in the dumps? Quiet Storm Quiet Storm and fellow Loveshackers, I have a great friend whose boyfriend is going through depression, and says the "you deserve better" line to her. And if youre lucky enough that your partner is close by, heres an option. Its a polite way of saying that youre on a different level than him, complete with attitude and all.